“You asserted that nobody is born homosexual and I just wondered what support you had for that. I might like to read it.”
Indeed! Well, I certainly owe you a book!! And hopefully it will be published in the future. I would like to co-author one, but it’s not going to happen too quickly.
So, for the time being, here is a quick take on it.
I asked why you thought that might not be the case in order to better explain certain points, depending where you are coming from.
I believe one of the main problems refers to the false opposition between inborn versus “free” choice. The problem with this false opposition is that it eliminates from consideration a very large and significant part of the mind that is neither inborn, nor chosen. There is a very important third sphere that is being left out and which is very real and which complements the other two.
A person is born with a developmental matrix, including to develop into a heterosexual adult that has healthy, adult relationships with the opposite sex. However, this matrix is not finished and it will change (including being deformed) in a variety of directions. Therefore, the mind has a deep plasticity; regarding many characteristics, it’s not hard-wired. Although you began to feel certain feelings about boys early on, if you had been abused or had had other deforming experiences, they could impact how your mind functioned regarding sexuality and the opposite sex.
So, a key point is that any person’s mind will develop conscious and unconscious mechanisms and dynamics that can deeply affect it later in life, which were not present when this individual was born.
This is why people are not born pedophiles, homosexuals, necrophiles, etc. Although there are different levels of choices regarding sexuality and one’s behaviors, no one with a particular sexuality dysfunction deliberately chooses all of its dynamics – and *especially* not the unconscious ones. Since when do you choose what goes on in your unconscious? However, this doesn’t mean we are helpless, little creatures with no free will.
So, human beings are born heterosexual, but they aren’t finished as infants. That means that a person’s mind will change and develop or degenerate in infinite ways. Homosexuality is similar to any other psycho-sexual dysfunction – in terms of being a dysfunction. It is not inborn, but like other dysfunctions, such a disorder or dysfunction is developed over time, due to a set of factors that can vary from individual to individual.
You solve the underlying psychological, cultural, sociological issues producing various homosexual dynamics in the mind of such an individual, and the person lives as they were born to be: heterosexual. It’s not a question of changing the blueprint, it’s a question of solving underlying issues that are preventing the person from relating to the opposite sex, or which are disorienting the person towards the same sex.
I will add something about biology in another comment.
I also recommend this article:
The social sciences cannot settle the moral status of homosexuality.
Stanton L. Jones
Note that there is an expanded version of the article also available.
There is nothing that consists in a sound argument of why a person would be born deformed as a homosexual.
Because a person with a homosexual problem is not the same as an intersex person. That an intersex person could be disoriented towards the same sex is understandable, because of their lack of correct sexual definition – which is biological. But these people are not whom we are referring to when we say “homosexual.”
What we call a homosexual is a person who is biologically heterosexual, but only psychologically has problems with heterosexuality. There is no reason why anyone would be born this way, just as there is no reason why anyone would be born a pedophile, a necrophile, etc.