Jeez!  I just spent I don’t know how long trying to find this book in a variety of search engines! It just wouldn’t show up easily! Incidentally because of this I discovered “” – very good! Seems much better than Google, but maybe it depends on the type of search? By the way, anyone else thinks that Google results are getting worse and worse (extremely limited, including suspiciously censored?)

In any case, I thought I had blogged about this autobiographical book before, but maybe I just mentioned it in some Internet “debate” (er, brawl). Since I couldn’t find it here either – and it wasn’t for lack of trying one keyword after another and wading through results – I had to go search the web. Not easy, but hey, I found it, so here it is, noted for the future.

I wanted to tweet this book to Duke University (@DukeU) because of their gay mafia move to require students to read a lesbian pornographic graphic novel (“Fun House”) and then say it wasn’t required reading once the scandal broke.

One Amazon review:

on March 7, 2013
Painful at times to read–but I can only imagine how painful it was to write–and cathartic. I heard Dawn speak on a radio show and was impressed. Though the narrative occasionally skips around in time, it is well-written and holds together through some 4 decades of her turbulent life. The incredible thing is that she never failed in loving her parents despite this terrible betrayal.

The book is a portrait of the cost of sexual appetites unchecked and unleashed on the innocent. It reveals the generational nature of sexual sin–how it is passed down and through a family. Along the way, some innocents are miraculously restored to life; and some (like Dawn and her brother) rejoin the living only slowly.

Don’t be afraid to read it.

Dawn Stefanowicz has boldly and openly shared a horrific life that is becoming more and more prevalent as society and its norms continue to crumble. In her personal memoir, Out From Under, Dawn reveals the mental torment she and her two siblings were raised in by a homosexual father and a weak mother.


Dawn’s book is more than a personal analyzation of trauma caused by bad parenting. It reveals the darker side of a father’s sexual appetites and how they can destroy the psyche of everyone he touches. It is not for the faint hearted. Be warned!

A thread of the religious runs through this tormented family and Dawn’s ability to finally see true Christianity from the false is critical to her personal understanding of the need for a Father’s love.

As Dawn openly works through her needs for love and affection it is clear this book is a manual for others that may find themselves in similar situations. She does not gloss over the ugly nor make it look like easy work. Change is never easy. But she eloquently shows her love and affection for her father and sees him as he truly was. Her ability to continually forgive the many ways her father continued to cause her pain throughout his life, show a strength that can only from the determination to deal with her own shortcomings over and over again.

Dawn’s marriage and ability to be completely vulnerable with her husband show that they are in this thing together. Her self analysis by journaling was a step forward in her own healing and sharing those journaling efforts with her husband, seem to help her place her situations in perspective.

For those of us who love others in alternative lifestyles, this book is a warning of the effects of gay parenting and the backlash that it can create on the social structure of a society. Dawn speaks for those who cannot. May her work not be in vain.

Children are the most vulnerable of society and a society that will not protect its own children is a sad one indeed. May we be brave enough to love, reach out to and rescue these little ones who are hidden among us.

By Dawn Stefanowicz ISBN 1-59977-011-3

I have not read it by the way.